Comfort of Cousins

Spent this last week with family again.  Extremely grateful for family now more than ever.  This time family came up to my sister’s from South Florida for some girl time.  Wedding planning,shopping, catching up and of course lots of baby snuggle time.   There is no replacing Mom, but aunts can sure due when you need a dose of expert female advice mixed in with memories and that security of being with someone who has been there over the years and knows where you are coming from.  I only hope that one day, my nephew finds comfort in time together as much as I enjoy time with my aunts.

Had to laugh inside when my aunt surprised with a new glass!

1013377_10201349843050423_1615035369_n

My cousin is OBSESSED with Tervis tumblers & my sister seems to love hers. To me they seemed like overpriced cups, something I had plenty of in my house.  My aunt did just like my Mom used to do when we all would go out shopping.  Sneaky buy something she thought might make you smile, just because.  Guess it runs in the family.  Which comforts me.

It didn’t escape me that I had been upset about a broken glass and now I was being presented with a new (nearly unbreakable) one that in a totally different way, was so very me.

Plus this one is proving to be incredibly useful in traveling in the heat.  Can’t believe it kept ice in a blazing hot car while we shopped.  Also loving that it I can take it to class and not worry about accidentally setting my notes or book on wet rings left on the desk top.

Cousins…  to me they are just siblings that aren’t around as much!  Giggles together just seem more pure and healing.  Felt great being with my sister & two of my cousins all weekend.  No big events, nothing we had to get done.  Just togetherness.

Yesterday brought me back home and to reality.

One of those realizations was that there are six weeks til the Electric Run 5K & it is time to formally lay out training schedule.  So I did.  But for me this isn’t about times or pushing myself physically as much as it is overcoming this danged fear of crowds.  Figure under the cover of night & with the distraction of the glow in the dark, fun party atmosphere, I can do it & have fun.  Still it is a 5K & part of it will be finishing without completely dropping dead on the track.  I have been less than organized about exercising.  Baby steps.

sorry for the blurry pic, but I was on a treadmill, unlike the pug

sorry for the blurry pic, but I was on a treadmill, unlike the pug

Unfortunately Baxter isn’t as excited and is going to be less than motivating.

Shattered Glass

Tropical Storm Andrea has come and passed.  While the storm was relatively uneventful, staying cooped up inside my house has been an emotional tempest.

I broke my favorite champagne glass.

390817_10201255488851627_1853768443_n

Yup. That one.

I know. I know.  Whiny 3rd world problem.  Shut up & suck it up.  You have more & you can get more.  Pick up the pieces and move on.

Which I would have and was in the process of doing, when I realized just how much that glass meant to me.  The storm surge of memories that flooded my mind and heart destroyed me.  I sank into the muddy waters of depression for the night.

All started when I remembered where I got those glasses.  A natural thought when you think you want to replace something.  They were a christmas present from my parents.  I remember thinking how beautiful they were and how they were so me.  Crystal champagne glasses etched with a million lil spirals.  The look on my Mom’s face as I gushed said it all.  She did good & got me.  It was one of those gifts that I hadn’t asked for, but that was a step in confirming that finally we got each other.  She would have never had a use for them, but she knew I would love them, and I did/do.

One would have been enough, but she bought the pair.  For some reason as a single gal without a guy in her life at that moment, it seemed to symbolize hope.  I remember thinking how these were the type glasses that should be used in special toasts & that I hoped one day to toast to a happy marriage with these.  Now IF that ever happened, I wouldn’t be toasting with the piece of my Mom being there.  (Probably didn’t help anything that the dating life isn’t anything to blog about at the moment.)

I got sad.  Yes more than I should have & yes was over reacting to the simple act of breaking a glass.  But I’m being honest.  Blogging is cheaper than therapy & a lot less annoying to my friends, I’m sure.  It was a crap day before.  This just was the icing on the cake & the desire to call my Mom, the only person who might get the weight of that shattering drop, sent me over the edge.

I cried & just gave up on the day.  Sometimes you just have to give in & feel.  Maybe it would have been healthier to see out someone and make the day more than the wreck of a day that it was, but I chose to feel it all.  So I moped.

Netflix provided the horror movies to watch (& feel better that my life wasn’t as bad as those on the screen) & thanks to impulse shopping my food choices for the day went from a healthy green smoothie breakfast to a lunch/dinner of beef jerky, garlic bagel chips, chocolate chip cookies and frozen dark chocolate banana slices.   Meh.

So what happened next? Did it magically make everything better?

Nope.  But I woke up from a night of some pretty sad dreams about my Mom to feeling that today, it is ok.  It still sucks & I can never replace the glass, but the memories are there.  Even if I did replace the glass, it wouldn’t be THE SAME GLASS.

Grief really is one of those things that can hit you out of the blue.  You start to feel better and think you are fine only to see that it still really hurts.  I think you have to have the cry sessions and stop to really feel everything in order to not completely go crazy from it all. Reading through a couple of grief books last night reminded me of this.  It is normal to feel good one moment & pain the next.

Thankfully after stormy days come blue skies.  Today I do feel better.  Slightly sad still but I can recognize that a glass is just a glass.  The hopes and love that I saw in that glass, are still here.  Just as my mom still lives on inside me.

To that I raise a glass & say CHEERS! Only this morning it is a glass of water!

To that I raise a glass & say CHEERS!
Only this morning it is a glass of water!

Run Ali Run

OK I admit, I am not a runner.  Walking suits me just fine.  Running is one of those things I just never got into.  I don’t feel the need to be the fastest person on the block.  Maybe I read Aesop’s the Tortoise and the Hare a few too many times.  Still… there is something about it that intrigues me.  The runner’s high, the peace and therapy of a good run sound amazing.  Not to mention the health benefits that clearly come from developing the habit.

So starting small.  Training starts today.  The past have just been warm ups.  Now on to the good stuff.

I already mentioned that I have a jar of marbles previously.  At the end of 100 miles (1 per marble) I am treating myself to some bright colorful new sneakers!

c400x278

Girls have to strut in new shoes somewhere so I have decided on my place.

The ELECTRIC RUN!

Electric-Run-Pic-3

Because frankly the party looks amazing!

Volunteering at the Color My Run in Charlotte was a blast so I expect nothing but fun for this one as well.  Glow in the dark goodness!  This time I am all in.

Just so happens to also be National Running Day today!

6zsu8i9u_1370438799

So here goes nothing!  Cheers.  Get out and get moving… or at least kick it on the treadmill for a while.  Do it now, because there will come a day all too soon where you just no longer can.  When that day comes, I want to sit back and laugh about all the memories I made!

So are you in?

Blasting the Blues

What a weekend!

Sometimes it totally rocks to follow your impulses.  This time it got me to toss powder into strangers faces!  LEGALLY… don’t worry.  It was fun for all involved although I think I had the most fun.

060113084124

In the spirit of trying as much new fun stuff as possible this year & living life in full color, I signed up to volunteer at the Charlotte Color My Run!  About a week before the event.  Color runs just looked like a lot of fun, even if “organized” herds of people running down the streets gives me panic attacks.  What better way to over come this than by being there, but not committed to doing the race? Actually I don’t think they call it a “race”, but rather a fun run.

Saturday started WAY too early for me but thankfully my drive thru quick fix of Starbucks latte & banana bread offered a sweet surprise – it was FREE!  The car in front of me paid for my purchase.  I nearly cried.  Was incredible to have done that so many times & giggle as I pull off thinking how I hoped it made someone else’s day, then it was me!  Just wish I had been able to call Mom up & tell her.  She would have loved it almost as much as me.

Downtown Charlotte was quieter than I have ever seen it before.  Seeing the Panther’s stadium made it all more exciting & comforting at the same time.  The race route went around the streets surrounding the stadium.

Found the tent, got the shirt and the teams got dropped off to set up the color stations.  I nearly squealed to hear I was on the BLUE crew!  Just exactly what I would have picked if given a choice.

2013-06-01_08-39-52_735

I had a BLAST!  Just before it started it dawned on me I was going to be basically just attacking people with burst of color thrown at them…. awkward.  But we got hyped up before we started by testing out the color and the bottles, scoops & every other way we could think of to make sure everyone who came by turned as blue as possible.

Before long we had attracted the attention of a few neighborhood kids, who we invited to join in the fun (if they got the Ok from parents & put on some clothes they didn’t mind getting dirty).  It was unreal the way their faces lit up!  Watching them play was almost as much fun as playing ourselves.

2013-06-01_10-36-59_374

Never felt better with the blues!

& yes I got THAT blue….every exposed inch of skin.  New Avatar movie I can try out for?

Thankfully I got some tips before hand & took supplies to clean up enough to make it home to really clean up.  In all honesty I’m still cleaning up.  Blue hair, don’t care.  Loving it!

IMG_20130601_104842

Funny enough the clothes I thought would be trash afterward cleaned up easier than I did!  Only real trace of color is on my socks, which is ok with me.

2013-06-01_11-51-44_800

So now that I know just how fun this all can be, I have to do it again.

So on to sharing one of the goals this month.

I’m doing 100 miles this month.

Untitled #355

 

Remember those marbles in the glass?  Each one is going to be a mile.  Move all the marbles & I am going to be buying myself some new sneakers!  Brightly colored, awesome new sneakers.  I’ve been eyeing them all over and really want a pair, but I don’t NEED a pair.  So I am making myself earn this.

Hopefully soon I can break in those new sneakers and do a fun run of my own!

What Can I Put Glitter On Today?

Had a wonderful afternoon with a bestie that it had been far too long since we had been in the same city at the same time.  There is just something special about  laughter shared between two old friends.  Warms the soul and reminds you that relationships really are what life is all about.

Thankfully after a crazy not so great day yesterday, today has been simply bliss. Just like I was determined it would be!

We all need me days sometimes.  Relax.  Pamper yourself.  Splurge. Get creative & let your heart thrive!

After lunch & a few errands it was play time.  Pintester style!

See today is the first day ever of THE PINTESTER MOVEMENT!

The Pintester herself has motivated bloggers all over to try that idea that they have pinned on Pinterest & just set aside.  Together we are all just getting off our duffs & doing it.   (& if you haven’t check out the Pintester blog, you really need to! She tries it ALL…. win or lose.)

First project I decided to attempt is a simple one I have admired for too long.  Everyone needs a notebook that makes them smile.  For me, glitter does that!  Purple glitter… that smile gets extra big!  A Girl In Paradise posted how she dazzled up a basic composition book a while ago and I pinned it for later.  It sat waiting but thanks to Pintester’s push… here goes nothing!

Basic composition books are cheap, but lets face it… a tad boring.  Luckily I found purple ones on sale & grabbed a few.  Still they didn’t exactly inspire greatness.  So glitter it up!

I used her tutorial, but added in a few steps like 1) Oops I forgot to put on the painters tape &  2)Crap I know I have some around this house somewhere, oh hell just use this packing tape.  You basically smear modge podge all over the cover & sprinkle glitter on it, then follow up with another layer of the modge podge to lock it in.

320

Hint: Check the glitter bottle BEFORE shaking. For some reason it wasn’t working til I discovered it needed to be opened!

322

Still need to let it dry,  but I LOVE it so far.  Probably not the best for heavy usage unless you don’t mind glitter all over, but I don’t mind.

333

Got lucky when I went to get the modge podge & glitter & found a sale.  Which means MORE CRAFTINESS!  They had bags of marbles & glass rocks for $1 each.  My mind immediately went to two pins & I decided in the spirit of the day, they too will be done.

Both again entirely too simple to have waited this long to do.

One for sharing smiles and one for motivation.

First the one for me… well a teaser.  I have seen the weight loss motivation jars of marbles all over pinterest.  Great visual of how far you have gone & what you have left.  Decided to do my own version.  More to come on that later, but I will say there are a hundred little marbles in the glass that I hope to move over starting in June!  Not going to be pounds lost but there will be a fitness aspect.

312

Second one involves rocks and strangers.

I love seeing the colorful painted stones.  Easy peasy, but again one of those things I just never took time to do. Til the Pintester Movement!

cheap rocks, cheap paint, cheap brushes.... smiles to strangers randomly - priceless

cheap rocks, cheap paint, cheap brushes…. smiles to strangers randomly – priceless

The plan (after they finish drying) is to try to carry a few around & slip them all over for people to find.  Could bring a smile to someone or at least spark a bit of curiosity! Why not spread the love?

2013-05-30_18-29-48_73

Finally on to the last one.  The beverage!  Anyone who has ever spent anytime on Pinterest has drooled over their share of photos of food & drinks they wish they could taste through the screen.  I know probably half my pins are food.

On a hot day like today, you need something cool & this one hit the spot.  I had seen it just yesterday on Pinterest and decided it was worth trying.

I'm not a mason jar girl but that looks so good.

I’m not a mason jar girl but that looks so good.

Watermelon, coconut water & lime juice.  De-fricking-lish.  Skinny Summer Blender drink? yes please!

390817_10201255488851627_1853768443_n

So the mini watermelon I bought SAID seedless, but in reality had these small white seeds all through it.  No worries though, the blender made nice work of them.  It is 3 parts watermelon, 1 part coconut water, with a splash of lime juice.  The real recipe had mint which probably is really good, but only if you have some on hand or remember to buy it with the other ingredients… which I didn’t. So meh.  No mint, but it is really good.

I went for champagne glass instead of the mason jar.  Just more my style.

2013-05-30_18-40-38_546

Also if you go big & take a massive sip like I may or may not have, it may or may not leave a read “milk mustache” on your lips.  Fun!  Would be a great summer drink for party fun.  Even if you add some champagne, which I may or may not have done on my second glass!  It could be really good like that, just saying.

So there you go.

Pins pinned & actually done.

Guess that means Pinterest isn’t such a waste of time after all right?

Maybe tomorrow I will be more productive in things that matter, but I wouldn’t trade today for anything in the world.  Got to play once in a while.

 

Blog? What Blog?

Life is just flying by!

Been spending a lot of time with family lately.  Seems babies & life just take a lot of attention.  I thought with Mom’s passing I would be in Charlotte less, but seems I’m here more than ever.

My goals & world seem to have been put on hold, but I don’t mind a bit.  Turns out newborns aren’t scary at all.  I ADORE taking care of my nephew! Diapers, crying & all.  Who knew? He just has a way of making all right in the world.  The faces he makes melt me.

I joke about how much this year has been awful and that I can’t take much more 2013, but then I remember 2013 is the year this sweet cherub arrived & stole our hearts.  Thankfully.

42895f9b21b93cda97b0c8d50185535c

Hope for the future.

So on to getting back to normal, the new version of it…. sooner or later.

Til then we are taking things one onesie at a time.  Baby steps and big dreams.

Tonight I head back home to a hot house where the air condition has decide to quit.  Dentist visit, homework for this summer session’s classes, lots of laundry, then hoping to hit the beach for a me day before I head back to the Queen City.  Living the gypsy life on the move,  but cramming it all full of family, memories & good food.  So many plans brewing in my head but for now I’m content just being where I am.

A to Z

My world has completely been turned upside down.

Wednesday, I became an aunt officially!

buddy

After seeing glimpses of how changed my world would be if I lost my sister & her baby, we got the best news we could ever hear – I had  a new nephew and both he & his Mom were doing good.

Zane entered the world and we will never be the same.

Already he has his aunt wrapped around his tiny little fingers.  Luckily he is one of the best mannered and sweetest beings on the planet.  Hardly a fuss at all.  Content to be snuggled and enjoy seeing anything you care to share.

If only Mom could be here getting to know this guy and getting to see my sister being the natural mom she is.  She has to be so very proud.  Today I was lucky enough to get to give my nephew his first nail trim.  Didn’t even have a clue how babies have such sharp nails at birth!  Hard to fathom that it wasn’t that long ago I gave Mom her the last manicure.   So many questions I wish I could ask her right now.  Learning so much and feel so blessed to be included in this time.  Bit overwhelming how much has changed so quickly, but grateful for all we have.

So funny how in an instant, everything changes.

Sometimes, it even changes for the better!

Welcome to the world little one.  May you always know you are loved, laugh more than you cry & be lucky in all you do.  May you always be true to you.

2013-05-10_12-18-56_539